10 things NOT to say to someone who’s depressed
You’ve finally built up the confidence to talk to someone about your depression and anxiety, GREAT!
However, the conversation doesn’t always go as you planned. Here are some of the unhelpful things that people may say:
1. What’s wrong?
I’m not sure what is wrong!! Can’t I just come home and cry for no reason every night?
2. Why are you sad?
I’m not sad, depression is completely different. Please don’t downplay what I am going through.
3. You’ll feel better tomorrow after some sleep.
Maybe, but I probably won’t.
4. What happened to make you depressed?
Nothing in particular has happened, this is just a culmination of everything that I am thinking and feeling right now.
5. There are people who have it much worse than you.
I know that already, and it reminds me how selfish I am that I feel depressed when others go through much worse. There must be something wrong with me.
6. You just need to act positive.
Great! My danxiety is gone now thank you so much.
7. Yeh I completely get what you mean. Shall we see what’s on Netflix?
I have just opened up my deepest feelings and you can’t even be bothered to engage in the conversation?
8. What are you depressed about?
I wish I knew.
9. You just need some fresh air.
I don’t have the motivation to leave the house. I have also tried that before and didn’t feel better. Also my social anxiety means that I’m terrified someone might ask me for directions.
10. Maybe you’re thinking too much.
Maybe I am, but there isn’t just a switch I have to make me stop thinking about things.
Trying to explain depression and anxiety to people who have never experienced it can be exhausting and emotionally draining. The things that people say can be upsetting. However, you should remember that people are trying to be there for you and say the right thing but are unsure of what that is.
So try not to be infuriated, but try as best you can to calmly explain what it feels like, and the best way they can support you.
If you can relate to this post, share it with people to help them understand how you’re feeling. Hopefully it will lead to a much calmer conversation!
What other unhelpful things have been said to you?